FIN24 : No Bonus for Eskom CEO

 The ID has stated that Eskom's CEO should not get his bonus this year, because he has not sorted out the issues at the parastatal.

I think you're way to easy on him and his whole management team.  They've proven beyond doubt that they cannot manage the company, and the problems aren't the same as last year, they are getting worse.  The fact that the CEO got a bonus last year, measured in millions, is appalling!

Replace the whole top structure with people qualified for the job, so that our country can start growing.

Link to FIN24 : Empowering Financial Decisions

Verkoopsman

'n Verkoopsman wat van deur tot deur loop klop aan die soveelste deur.
'n Seuntjie, so ag jaar oud, maak die deur oop. Hy het sykouse aan met bypassende kousophouers. In sy een hand is 'n Martini en in die ander 'n vet sigaar.
"Is jou mammie tuis boeta?" vra die verkoopsman.
Die seuntjie kyk stip na hom vir twee sekondes en antwoord stadig: "Lyk dit fokkin so?"

Mayor ‘puts Merc before water’: South Africa: News: News24

 This is getting ridiculous!  If you read the article, have a look at the related ones as well.

All over the country the mayors of small towns are spending huge amounts of money on their mayoral cars (read company cars), instead of spending the money on necessities for the community.

This abuse of power has got to stop now!

I think the national government needs to step in here and pass legislation as to how much each class of mayor is allowed to spend on a car.  I'm not saying they should not get cars to do their duties, but does the mayor of Pofadder(just an example) really deserve the same type of car as the mayor of Jo'burg or Cape Town?  Hell No!

Run it like a group of companies.  You have your CEO (the president of the country), he's allowed to get the big car with the chaufeur.  Let's say he can spend 1,5 million for example.  His direct reports (cabinet ministers) are allowed to spend 1 million.  This is the "holding company".

Now, all subsidiaries(cities & towns) are allowed to buy cars for their management, but they're not allowed to be worth more than what the holding company's management is driving, and it should also be reflective of the size of company(town) you run.

So, for the big cities, the companies that contribute most to the holding company, the management can splash a bit, and lets say spend 600K-750K.  There are only 6 or 7 of these.  Then the price comes down as the size of the town comes down.  So that the mayor of a small rural town in Mpumalanga(once again an example), is only allowed to get a Toyota Corolla or something similarly priced.  That is more in line with the amount of responsibility you have.

This system works well, and is understood well in the business world, it is time our government wakes up to the fact.  When you are ellected to office, it is first and foremost to serve the community, if you do it well, they will reward you, it is not to serve your own interests, and abuse your newfound power.

 

Source: Mayor 'puts Merc before water': South Africa: News: News24

Reincarnation

 

Colin came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as
he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.
He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed
wearing a long flowing white robe.
"Who the hell are you?" Demanded Colin, "and what are you doing in my
bedroom?"

The mysterious Man answered, "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter".
Colin was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much to
live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family….you've got to send me
back straight away".

St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch.
We can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
Colin was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his
house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.

A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground.
"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling
welling up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen, how
are you enjoying your first day here?"
"It's not so bad" replies Colin, "but I have this strange feeling inside
like I'm about to explode".

"You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
laid an egg before". "Never" replies Colin
"Well just relax and let it happen"

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops
out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and
his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the
firsttime.

When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
ever happened to him…ever!!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
shouting

"Colin, skrik wakker jou dronk vark, jy KAK in die bed!!!"

The world is my dustbin

What is it with South African drivers and their need to hear glass break on tar wherever they go?  In the last 3 years the amount of borken glass on our roads has gotten much worse, and the other worrying fact is that it is mostly alcohol bottles being broken on the roads.  A lot of green glass, and often you can still see the labels stuck to parts as well.

I'm getting quite sick of this, because of the amount of time I spent on the road on a bicycle, I have to keep on dodging glass, sometimes in the face of oncoming traffic.  Unfortunately bicycle tyres have a similar price to car tyres, and I cannot afford to keep on replacing them on a too regular basis so I have to dodge the glass.

It also seems that most South Africans think that our beautiful country is one big dustbin, no need to walk to the nearest bin to dump rubbish, just drop it where you want.

All of us are directly or indirectly paying for waste management services, why not use it?

You do not see this problem in other countries, because there you would get a severe fine, or even jail time for dumping your rubbish on the street.  These countries have a proper strategy in place.  It's called visible policing, and their cops aren't too lazy to enforce even the simplest of rules, by the book!  Why can't our cops do the same?

Etiket vir Tappits

ALGEMEEN

1. Moet nooit bier saam vat na 'n job interview nie.
2. Probeer eers uitvind wie die mense in jou jaard is voor jy begin skiet.
3. Die dominee smaak dit nie as jy 'n cooler box saam vat kerk toe nie.
4. As jy die bed moet stofsuig is dit tyd om ander lakens op te sit.
5. Selfs al is jy seker jy is ingesluit in die testament, moenie jou Venter saam sleep na 'n begrafnis toe nie.

UITEET

1. As jy wyn skink, tilt die paper cup sodat jy nie die "vrug" van die wyn bederf nie.
2. As jy uit die bottel uit drink, hou hom so vas sodat jou vingers die label toehou.

ONTHAAL IN JOU HUIS

1. Moenie jou geliefde opgestopte hamster/kat/hond/aap op die koffietafel sit nie.
2. Moenie dat jou hond van die tafel af eet nie (al is sy maniere beter as jou gaste s'n).

PERSOONLIKE GESONDHEID

1. Terwyl ore gereeld moet skoongemaak word, is dit 'n job wat verkieslik met jou eie bakkiesleutels gedoen moet word.
2. As jy toiletware reg gebruik kan jy 'n paar dae gaan sonder 'n wassie.
3. Grond en olie onder jou vinger naels is 'n social nee, want dit gee daai finger snacks 'n snaakse smaak en cherries laaik dit nie so kwaai nie.

VERHOUDINGS (buite die familie)

1. Bied altyd aan om die aas aan jou goose se hoek te sit, veral met die eerste date.
2. Wees aggressief. Laat weet haar jy wag al twee jaar om met haar uit te gaan nadat jy daai goed gelees het teen die toilet muur daar by die jol plek.
3. Maak seker jy vind uit by haar ma-hulle wanneer sy by die huis moet wees. Party sal sê 10-uur, ander "Maandag". As die antwoord Maandag is, is dit jou job om te sorg dat sy betyds by die skool is.

FLIEK

1. Huilende babas moet verkieslik na die voorportaal gevat word en onmiddellik na die show gehaal word.
2. Moenie met die mense op die screen probeer praat nie. Jarelange wetenskaplike navorsing het bewys dat hulle jou nie kan hoor nie.

TROUES

1. Kleinvee is nie so 'n hot trougeskenk nie.
2. As jy die bruid langer as 5 sekondes soen, kan jy miskien geskiet word.
3. Vir die bruidegom: Huur 'n tux; 'n corduroy broek en T-shirt met 'n cummerbund werk nie so lekker nie. Stofepipes is ook uit.
4. Al is dit moelik, sê maar ja vir sokkies en skoene (al is dit dan net vir die kerk).

BESTUUR

1. Dim jou ligte as 'n kar van voor af kom, al is jou gun gelaai.
2. As jy by 'n 4-way stop kom, ry die ou met die grootste wiele eerste, daarna die ou wie se exhaust die hardste raas.
3. Moet nooit 'n ander blaar se kar tou met pantyhose en duct tape nie.
4. As jy jou vrou/goose met 'n kannetjie stuur om te gaan petrol haal, is dit swak maniere om haar te vra om bier ook terug te bring.
5. Moenie spin as jy in 'n begrafnisstoet ry nie.

Spam

The blog spammers have found my site, so I've had to disable anonymous posts.  When I get around to it, I'll install CAPTCHA support and enable it again, but for now, just register if you would like to comment.