Funny code comments

//

// Dear maintainer:

//

// Once you are done trying to ‘optimize’ this routine,

// and have realized what a terrible mistake that was,

// please increment the following counter as a warning

// to the next guy:

//

// total_hours_wasted_here = 16

//

 

Me: “[Company] tech support, how may I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I’ve got a problem. Your program is telling me to get a pet snake. I don’t want one.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Caller: “It’s giving me a message telling me I need a snake to run it.”

Me: “Read the message to me please.”

Caller: “Error: Python required to run script.”

 

 

#define TRUE FALSE //Happy debugging suckers

 

return 1; # returns 1

 

long john; // silver

 

Exception up = new Exception(“Something is really wrong.”);

throw up;  //ha ha

 

// somedev1 –  6/7/02 Adding temporary tracking of Login screen

// somedev2 –  5/22/07 Temporary my ass

Marketing vs Sales – There is a difference

I see a lot of small businesses go big in the social media space to get their name out there.  This is a good thing, but does not necessarily pay the bills at the end of the month.  All you are achieving is that people are now aware of you.  They haven’t yet seen your offering, they just know you are in the market, and what kind of product or service you supply.

If they are at a stage where they’re looking for a replacement product/service to the one they are currently using, they may even make a decision to try your offering.  Building a client base this way is slow, because ultimately you’re only getting sales from the people who are in the right frame of mind at the time they see your marketing.

Sales is a different process, you target specific people or groups of people, and you get in their face with your offering, actively telling them of the benefits of it.  And not relenting until you have an answer, even if it is no.  This is a faster way of building your client base, even though it is twenty times scarier.  And the only reason it is scary, is because a larger percentage of people will say no than yes.  This is a fact of sales.  So accept it, and get out there and sell.

Marketing should be an extra effort, not the only effort.